|As a member of a very large swing club for over 3 years, I can tell you that hiring an escort and bringing her to a swing club event, being dishonest, pressuring people, rudeness and bad pushy behavior are some very good ways to be banned for life.|
Swinging is a couples activity. This seems like a simple observation, but it's actually a very complicated issue. When you have sex, it is almost always a one-to-one activity -- it is very bad form to pay attention to someone else while you are fucking him or her. But in the swinging context, you make love to someone who is part of a couple, and by extension, you are having an encounter with their partner as well. Both your concentration and your partner's will be affected by the presence of others -- for some people, this is the whole point, while for others, it is secondary to the pleasure of physically experiencing a new partner.
In the great majority of encounters, two couples will switch partners temporarily, so that all four of them can be involved. Frequently one or more of the parties will end up making love with someone that is not absolutely perfect for them, or doesn't turn them on completely, because their partner has a real hard-on/soaking quim for your opposite number in the other couple. But sex is like pizza; it's never THAT bad.
If you are a single, male OR female, you are most likely asking to have sex with someone while offering nothing to their partner. Some couples enjoy this very much, love having an extra cock or pussy to play with in the course of an encounter and don't mind "waiting their turn" sometimes. But most men in the swing culture are NOT bisexual, and would not be all that interested in a queen triad threesome. If you convince half of a couple to go off alone with you, which certainly happens, what kind of an experience are you creating for that person's partner? Even people who are really completely cool with group sex and partner-swapping are likely to have trouble if one of them gets laid and the other doesn't.
When I'm at the swing club and looking for other couples to play with, I find myself looking at the men much more intently than the women, wondering if my wife will like them, and vice-versa. I'm a charming son-of-a-bitch, and if I can get a woman to let me kiss or touch her, I'm pretty much in like Flynn; but finding a man my wife can get hot for is a lot more challenging.
It is also very good advice that all couples discuss these ideas both before and after any possible action directed at making them a reality. Rules are important for many couples; in my mind, most rules are a symptom of your general unreadiness to participate in open sexuality. There is an essential cognitive leap required to truly enjoy swinging, and that is: Your partner's pleasure, no matter who inspires it, does not diminish you. I know that my wife's desire for another man's body is both constant and fleeting, that when she satisfies it, whe will come to me for love and comfort that a stranger cannot provide. I am at the center of her world, just as she is at the center of mine, and no amount of fucking and sucking can have any impact on that. And I frequently think that if I didn't KNOW this to be true, swinging would be inconceivable for me.
If you are a single man at a swing club, you have a much better chance to make it with one of the single women who are also likely to be there. Typically, I see a ratio of two single guys for each single girl, and that works out fine, since the ladies can generally go all night.
As for body forms, there are some extremely snotty and self-obsessed people in swinging who despise the fact that they even have to look at older, heavier people,but fortunately, they make up a tiny, tiny minority of the people in the "Lifestyle." In the club we belong to, the average age is probably around 38, but there are people from 21 to 75 present, and every body type you can imagine is present. We even have a nice scattering of black and asian people, which I understand is not true at all swing clubs. To some degree, possession of a hard cock, and a facility with the use of condoms, makes every man an adonis in this context.
That's the other thing -- if you can't work with condoms, if you can't bring your own condoms, if you can't be adult enough to put one on your cock even if the sweaty, writhing woman you are about to fuck doesn't ask you to, you shouldn't be a swinger.
Wow, didn't mean to go on for hours, but this has become a very important part of my life, and I find myself interested in having the "Lifestyle" portrayed as accurately as possible....
Have Fun :)